Here’s a book you’ll want to get and read. Trust me. It’s a fast and easy read, but it packs an important message. The book is Man Alive and it’s written by my friend and mentor Patrick Morley.

I first “met” Pat reading his groundbreaking book, Man in the Mirror, when it came out in 1989. It explored the 24 challenges men face in a fresh and authentic way. Quickly, it became a best-seller and I circulated my copy to many of the guys I hung out with at the time. Since that time, I’ve read every one of Pat’s books and I’ve had the pleasure to meet and work alongside him as part of the National Coalition of Ministries to Men, an organization that he co-founded and led for over a decade. In fact, you might say I’m weakly following in his footsteps having recently assumed the role of President of that organization.

So naturally, when he asked me to preview his latest book, I was more than delighted to do so and also to write an endorsement appearing in its pages. In my opinion, Man Alive is just the kind of book, like his first, that you’ll want to read and pass along to others that you know.

In it, Pat rightly observes that “most men know only enough about God to be disappointed with Him.” And so, it’s an invitation to rediscover a God who wants to satisfy their “seven primal needs,” as Pat puts it. These are: to know we are not alone; to know that God cares for us personally; to believe there’s a purpose for our lives; to break free from destructive behavior; to satisfy our thirst for awe; to love without reservation; and, to make a the world a better place. As his is style, Pat explores each need in compelling and practical ways, combining story with biblical truth that makes it easy for us guys to take in.

If you’re looking for something to revive your spirit and to share with other guys you care about, pick it up and take in for yourself. It goes on sale today at your favorite bookseller. Check out the book website for more info and for fun, watch a trailer of Pat navigating his Porsche at high speed.

What books have you found yourself sharing most often with others?

NOTE: I receive no compensation for this endorsement.

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The book’s title and subtitle are a bit misleading, however. From it, I expected to read another treatise on the importance of accountability groups to create bonds of male friendship. But my misgivings quickly vanished. Yoder rightly observes that most men’s groups are not even close to being honest; his delineation of why accountability groups are a farce is a refreshing and important perspective. No, this book is less a narrative on how to strengthen bonds between men, and more about the important conversations in which men can and should engage. The bond of brotherhood becomes a natural byproduct of that dialogue.

To that end, Bond of Brothers is a helpful catalyst for meaningful conversation. Yoder ruminates on a variety of topics apparently gleaned from his own bond of brothers dialogue, referred to simply as “Dinner and Conversation.” That they engaged each other’s souls is never in doubt. The longing for a father affirmation; the deceit of sports; conflict in marriage; sorrow; mid-life uncertainty; the irrelevance of church; it’s all there, in unvarnished transparency. Each of these important “conversations” is throughly seasoned with personal story and biblical truth to make it a valuable conversation catalyst for your men’s group.

“No man who reveals only his strength is showing his complete manhood,” Yoder writes. By this measure, Yoder is a man’s man, offering in his book not only wisdom for life but a good dose of his own shortcomings along the way. By the time I had finished this book, I felt that I knew something of the man Wes Yoder. As I set the book down, I found myself longing for another conversation with him.

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Men of Honor, Women of Virtue: The Power of Rites of Passage Into Adulthood (Seismic Publishing Group, 2010) is an indispensable resource for those of us desiring to bless our next generation in ways we’ve not personally experienced. Written by Dr. Chuck Stecker, President and Founder of A Chosen Generation, Men of Honor, Women of Virtue explores the confusing signals our culture sends to young people about what it means to be an adult and offers parents helpful strategies in guiding their children toward godly adulthood. Because many of us have grown up with our own unhealed wounds, Stecker graciously provides the dual balm of perspective and encouragement. “If we parents cling tightly to the hurt in our own hearts due to the lack of a father’s blessing, it’s hard to imagine how we can help our children walk in the fullness of who God created them to be,” he writes. And so, before laying a strategy for blessing our children, he deals with our own hearts and hurts.

Over the past five years I’ve gotten to know Dr. Stecker through the National Coalition of Men’s Ministry. Dr. Stecker is the real deal. I’ve watched him from a distance and up close. His passion for helping church communities become truly intergenerational is inspiring. His burden for youth is infectious. And his love for God and people is indisputable. He’s never hesitated or withheld a helpful word of advice when I’ve sought it from him on numerous occasions. As a parent desiring to give my children blessings I’ve not personally experienced, his counsel to me has been invaluable. Fortunately for all of us, much of that counsel is now captured in Men of Honor, Women of Virtue.

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Therapist and career counselor, Barbara Sher, combines skills from both disciplines in this easy-to-read New York Times bestseller. In the first three chapters, Sher seeks to illuminate what she refers to as our inner conflict. “One side of the conflict is arguing in favor of your getting what you want, and the other side is determined to stop you,” she writes. Getting a handle on the type of conflict is key to creating a strategy to overcome it. Each of the successive chapters are written to offer questions and strategies depending on the type of conflict. Are you:

• Thinking that the only way to make a change is to quit your job? You’ll find a strategy for that in the chapter entitled “The Sure Thing.”
• Thinking that you have so many interests it’s impossible to pick one? You’ll find some encouragement in Chapter 6.
• Thinking that you have no idea what you want to do? You’ll find some helpful ways to rediscover your interests in the chapter entitled “Regrouping: It’s A Whole New Ball Game.”

Sher covers eleven such inner conflicts in a format that I’ve found particularly helpful. When I first read it a number of years ago, three of the conflicts she described resonated with me. Though the book is written from a secular worldview and with a bit too much self-help, rah-rah, you-can-do-it-speak for my liking, the thought provoking questions and the breadth of her material is well worth the modest investment in time.

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“Whoever serves me must follow me; and where I am, my servant also will be. My Father will honor the one who serves me.”- John 12:26

Were you to stop at the Circle K gas station in Upland, Indiana and see Chuck Holsinger you probably wouldn’t give him a second thought. Just another senior citizen living out a peaceful retirement in a small midwestern college town. Were you to stop long enough to ask about him though, another story would emerge. Taylor University students Ryan Gates (yes, my son!), Ryan Klaver and Kelsey Getzin did just that. And in the process, became captivated by a story of a home-town hero. A hero, not only because of his patriotic service as a World War II veteran, but because after 85 years he’s still fighting for his homeland. After viewing this documentary, winner of eight film festival awards, I wonder how many forgotten heros live unnoticed in my midst.

Do you know an unsung hero? Leave a comment and honor them by sharing their story here. If there’s someone in your midst whose story you haven’t yet discovered, what are you waiting for?

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Recently, my friend, T.J. Addington, has written a helpful book to stir your inquisitive spirit. Live Like You Mean It (NavPress, 2010) offers, as the subtitle suggests, the “ten crucial questions that will help you clarify your purpose, live intentionally and make the most of the rest of your life.” As a personal development resource, it is concise and easy to read; absent of the literary dross that’s often found in other similar works. Live Like You Mean It offers just enough context to zero your focus on the critical questions, then gets out of the way so you can do your thinking. As the book suggests, questions of purpose and gifting are often best explored in community, and each chapter concludes with helpful questions that are well suited for group discussion.

T.J. Addington is the executive leader of international missions for the Evangelical Free Church of America. He is one of the most personally inspiring and intentional men that I know. In fact, I interviewed him about intentional living for a BoldMan Chronicles article nearly six years ago (read that interview). His inspiration to write Live Like You Mean It followed a traumatic 42-day hospital stay where 32 of them were in the intensive care unit in a coma and on a ventilator from complications related to a highly resistant strain of pneumonia. In the wake of that crisis, his passion for making the most of every opportunity intensified, girded by the renewed truth that every day is a gift of grace from God. Live Like You Mean It is the byproduct of a lifetime of “staying with the questions” which will help you do the same and make every day count.

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Fearless is as wonderfully written as you might expect from a New York Time’s best selling author who’s cranked out more than 50 books in 25 years (do the math!). It’s easy enough to digest in a sitting (just 180 pages), yet packed with enough nuggets of insight to make you stop and think. The subtitle, “Imagine your life without fear,” is aptly chosen, for Lucado stirs the imagination by presenting a potpourri of fears (e.g. dying, poverty, violence, insignificance, etc.) vanquishing amid God’s unceasing love for His creation. Lucado reminds us that Jesus’ most common command was to “fear not,” and each chapter puts that command in context of a fear that Jesus confronted in His disciples then and today. The disciple Lucado, himself, writes of his own fears with an honesty borne of the very freedom his book title promises.

I highly recommend reading this book as an important diagnostic—asking, “Where can I be more fearless today? Now that I’ve read it, it’s going back on my reading list, to be read aloud with my sons.

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